Saturday, January 8, 2011

for tara, as promised





An excerpt from party of one, THE LONER'S MANIFESTO by anneli rufus:

APART.
Such a simple concept. So concrete. So easy to represent on charts or diagrams with dots and pushpins either in or out. Yet real life is not dots. Some of us appear to be in, but we are out. And that is where we want to be. Not just want but need, the way the tuna needs the sea.

Simple: an orientation,not just a choice.
A fact.....We are loners. Which means we are at our best,
as Orsino says in the Twelth Night, when least in company.

We do not require company. The opposite in varying degrees,
it bores us, drains us, makes our eyes glaze over. Overcomes us like a steamroller....

Someone says to you, "Let's have lunch". You clench. Your sinews leap within you, angling for an escape. What others thrive on, what they take for granted, the contact and confraternity and sharing that gives them strength leaves us empty...

This is not about hate...It is not personal. I am not angry. Nor is this about being afraid. I am not shy. I do not have terrible manners. ..

Being a loner is not about hate, but need. We need what others dread.
We dread what others need.



5 comments:

Tara said...

Thank you, Sharon, for taking the time to post this. I'm off to add the book to my library queue.
And I love the photo here. The scene radiates serenity.

Sharon said...

Like I said, it's not a great book. After a while she seems overly defensive rather than objective but I did like the intro.

Tara said...

Thanks for the heads-up. I'll take what I can use and stop if it starts to feel weird. Seems like it would be worth perusing at the very least.

denise said...

"Being a loner is not about hate, but need. We need what others dread. "

Hall-e-freakin'-lu-jah. Exactly. Love a lot of that book.

denise said...

Oh, and yes, stop or skip through when it gets weird. There are many good lines in that book, but agree there are moments when I think, wait, you just RUINED it all! ;)