Placebo singing "I need a change. I need a change of skin."
is running a loop in my head right now. I can't seem to shake it. It won't even play correctly, it should be "I need a change of skin. I need a change" (not that that matters). Anyways, whatever's in my brain hitting repeat over and over again is absolutely right. I do need a change. I am so sick of myself. I am the long overstayed guest. And while I can't literally shed my skin, I really do need to reorient myself and my energies. Somewhere along the line I became distracted by the idea of becoming more independent, a contributor, pulling my own weight. What a joke! Materiality has never been terribly important to me and it makes no sense to pursue it now in the name of self enforced autonomy; especially at the expense of living mindfully, happily, and in the present. That being said, there seems little point in continuing to pursue priorities so clearly outside of myself. Perhaps just being aware of, and accepting my vulnerabilities in this area is enough.
is running a loop in my head right now. I can't seem to shake it. It won't even play correctly, it should be "I need a change of skin. I need a change" (not that that matters). Anyways, whatever's in my brain hitting repeat over and over again is absolutely right. I do need a change. I am so sick of myself. I am the long overstayed guest. And while I can't literally shed my skin, I really do need to reorient myself and my energies. Somewhere along the line I became distracted by the idea of becoming more independent, a contributor, pulling my own weight. What a joke! Materiality has never been terribly important to me and it makes no sense to pursue it now in the name of self enforced autonomy; especially at the expense of living mindfully, happily, and in the present. That being said, there seems little point in continuing to pursue priorities so clearly outside of myself. Perhaps just being aware of, and accepting my vulnerabilities in this area is enough.
