This is an excerpt from a play the Muse wrote in 2003 called Yesterday the FBI Came. It can be found in it’s entirety here.Playwright: (opens door) Can I help you?
Child: (shyly, talking in a low voice) I’m selling candy. Would you like to buy some?
Playwright: What kind is it?
Child: It's chocolate. (getting more animated as she makes her presentation) They're shaped like cruise missiles. They are red, white and blue. We’re selling them to help the children in Afghanistan. We hope to be able to send each child a Game Boy. It is a national program to enhance our understanding of other cultures. Each chocolate bar has a message for the evil-doers. (she opens a candy bar and shows it to the playwright). It says “kick butt”. It is all so exciting! My mother says I’m doing my part to help fight the war on terrorism. If I sell the most candy in our school system, I get a trip to Disneyland! Would you like to buy some?
Parrot: Buy some! Buy some!
Playwright: How much are they?
Parrot: Cheapskate! It's for the children of Afghanistan.
Playwright: You know bird, chocolate is poisonous to parrots. (parrot shuts up)
Child: They're $2 a bar.
Playwright: (looks at parrot). I'll take 10.
Child: (excited) Oh, thank you very much. You're so patriotic! (hands the playwright ten candy bars)
(playwright takes out wallet and pays the girl $20)
Child: Thank you again. (walks off porch and down sidewalk )
(playwright returns to his chair )
Parrot: (mocking) You're so patriotic!
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